A Tip of the Hat to Olde World Craftsmanship

Lean times were leaner for magicians, but “Daryl ‘The Daring’ Derringer” stood in front of Stavros the Haberdasher with explicit instructions for a top hat, and the two agreed $200 was a fair deposit for the $1100 custom headwear.

At his fitting two weeks later, the magician bitterly complained and, as he removed the hat, reached within and removed a turtle, insisting, “You SEE how VERY wrong this is!,” slipping the turtle into his trousers pocket and leaving the small shop, abruptly.

Four tantrum-ended fittings followed, except the animals appearing from the hat (only to disappear into the pocket) were a mouse, a wiggling goldfish, a huge cockroach, and tarantula, and Stavros (as always) was left alone and angry, puzzled and hurt.


The sixth fitting, Daryl proclaimed the hat to be perfect and, as he removed it, pulled a .45 caliber , 2-shot Derringer from under the brim and killed poor Stavros, walking out of the store with a smile and his bargain of a hat.

He entered the cluttered apartment striped with sunshine and, as if on cue, Casper-the-rabbit stood on his rear legs but was met with a reproachful tone from Daryl, “You’re retired, my furry friend, and much too old and fat for this, dear Casper.”


Daryl smoked an after-dinner cigar, staring down, mesmerized by the beauty of the hat that would revitalize his act when he suddenly stood, convulsed, and vomited an acrid mixture of dark ale, carrots and rabbit stew all over the ottoman and into the pride of the haberdasher’s craft.